Thursday, August 23, 2012
Do not worry
Do not worry. Jesus said that. He told us not to worry about what we eat/drink/wear or to worry about tomorrow. Princess Morag knows it is a good idea, and like most good ideas it is terribly difficult to put into practice. Much the same as getting up early - always a good idea - never easy (unless it is the day you are catching a flight somewhere and then she remarkably finds the motivation to spring out of bed).
Princess Morag was worried over as a child. And so she tried not to do much worrying herself as then there would definitely have been an excess of worrying going on. But then adult responsibilities arrived, and parenthood; consequently she has been doing a lot more worrying. In the baby days, Princess Morag was tempted to go into worry mode - but she recognised that it was dangerous territory. There is no end of harrowing scenarios that can immediately pop to mind the moment you are not in the same room as your baby, and even if you are holding your baby, you are still not safe....what if.....what if..... Better just not to go there in your mind.
Now that they are no longer babies and Princess Morag no longer watches them every second of every day, she is finding new things to worry about. The young master has started school. The moment Princess Morag had to watch her son walk into the classroom and did not know what was to become of him in the next 4 hours, she had an acorn of panic in her stomach. Sir Rianus, told her to just get in the car. She knew she should, but it was taking a lot of discipline not to follow the 5 year olds into the classroom - what were they going to be doing?? Could she really trust the teacher? The young master was fine. And so was Princess Morag. She has since managed to let the boy walk into the classroom 3 more times without following him in.
She was not so worried about the young maiden starting preschool, so no emotional energy was wasted on the girl who has chirped with happiness every day at pick up time.
Jesus said we can't add an hour to our lives by worrying (Matthew 6.27) and Princess Morag reckons worrying adds nothing to anyone, it only takes away. Having being worried over as a child, Princess Morag felt it was like an additional weight she had to bear on top of the health and emotional issues she was already facing. She wanted someone to take her burden away from her by listening to her and showing compassion - not to have that burden added to by knowing she was causing distress to someone else. Princess Morag does not want to worry about her children's future - today has enough worries to occupy her anyway and if she is busy worrying about the future she is not present to love her children in the present. And they are God's present to her everyday, she doesn't want to miss them.